WATCH: Bank Teller Laughs at Would-Be Robber

A man, wearing a hard hat, dark sunglasses and blue coverall, walks into a Wells Fargo Bank in Beaumont, Texas while talking on a cell phone on Tuesday. He lays a note on the teller's counter demanding money. Said teller (and a customer) looked at the note and laughed at his ass. Man takes note, runs out of bank. FAIL! Had this video had sound, it would've been more epic than the idiot who gave a

Rapper Lil' Webbie Arrested on Drug Charges

Lil’ Webbie aka Webbie aka Webster Gradney, Jr, 25, was arrested in Tennessee on Monday and charged with possession of schedule VI with intent to manufacture, sale or deliver and tampering with evidence.The car Webbie was a passenger in was stopped going southbound on Interstate 65 on Monday. They were initially pulled over for speeding in a rented 2010 Nissan Altima. As the vehicle pulled over,

Man Charged With Evidence Tampering After He 'Ate the Weed'

Richard Parker, 29, was pulled over by police in El Paso, Texas this morning because of a broken brake light, but as police approached the car, they detected a strong odor of weed coming from the inside of the vehicle. The officer then noticed that Richard's mouth was full and asked him to open his mouth. Richard complied and revealed it was full of weed. The officer asked him to spit it out, he

Lady Tries to Smuggle Cocaine in Diaper

Morla Ramos, 22, was arrested last night after she arrived at Boston's Logan International Airport on a flight from the Dominican Republic wearing a diaper filled with 1,000 grams of cocaine. According to reports, customs officials became suspicious after Morla's inconsistent answers about her travel, frisked her and found the cocaine hidden in an undergarment.source

Man Tries to Hire Hit Man to Kill Daughter's Boyfriend, Posts Reward Posters

Domingos Oliveira, 50, is not very bright. The Spring Valley, Calif. man was arrested this afternoon on suspicion of solicitation for murder after he posted "Wanted Dead or Alive" posters (below) about town offering $3000 to anyone willing kill his 19-year-old daughter's boyfriend.Police were contacted by Oliveira's daughter and boyfriend after several reward posters were posted on the Grossmont

Lady Consents to Having Her Breasts, Buttocks Massaged; Files Charges When She Finds Out Masseur is Straight

A 20-year-old woman from the How You Doin' state of New Jersey who consented to having her breasts and buttocks massaged at a Club H Fitness health club said she thought it was, a, normal, and b, the masseur was gay. But after someone told her that the 30-year-old masseur has a girlfriend, she filed a police complaint alleging sexual criminal contact, according to The Jersey Journal.The suspect,

Convicted Felon Chris Brown Flies Into a Rage, Shatters Window at 'GMA' Studios

Convicted felon Chris Brown went on a rampage and was acting a fool at "Good Morning America" this morning, where he was promoting his new album. (If you recall, his scheduled appearance on GMA in 2010 was abruptly canceled.) After host Robin Roberts asked about his criminal case stemming from his brutal assault on Rihanna [video is below], CFCB had an epic tempter tantrum, stormed into his

Do NOT Take Photos of This Guy's Hair

Johnathan Washburn, 23, and his friend Timothy Beard, 19, were arrested this week in Austin, Texas after they beatdown a man and stole his sunglasses after he tried to take a photo of Johnathan's triple mohawk hairstyle.When he photographed 23-year-old Johnathan Washburn’s mohawk, Timothy Beard, 19, told him to delete the picture from his digital camera, according to the affidavit. The man

LISTEN: Hello, 911? I Wanna Know Why I'm Being Handcuffed in Jail?

We, know, this sounds very familiar. In the wee hours last Sunday morning, Joseph Walsh, 26, of Sandusky, Ohio was arrested and charged with possession of cocaine, persistent disorderly conduct while intoxicated charges after he tried to pick a fight with patrons at a bar. Once he got to jail, however, Joseph pulled out his cell phone and called 911, telling the dispatcher he's being "hog tied"

Teller: Sure, You Can Rob This Bank, But I Need to See Two Forms of ID First

Nathan Wayne Pugh, 49, of Sachse (that's in Dallas, Texas), is a donkey. He was sentenced yesterday to more than eight years in prison after he robbed a Wells Fargo Bank last July of $800 -- while he was on parole for for two other aggravated robberies.According to an affidavit, Pugh walked up to a teller and said he wished to make a withdrawal. When she asked how much, he placed the bag on the

LISTEN: Man Claiming He OD'ed on Viagra Makes Obscene 911 Call

Matthew Wade Douglas, 28, was arrested in Oakland Park, Fla. after he (using a fake name) called 911 claiming he had overdosed on Viagra. While on the phone with the dispatcher (listen above), he described his symptoms in explicit details and claimed his "wife" was giving him a professional to help alleviate the pain. It's all too much! When police and paramedics arrived at the address Matthew

LISTEN: 'Hello, 911? I Broke Into a House and I Think the Owner is Going to Shoot Me'

Last night, Timothy Chapek, 24, broke into a home in Portland, Ore. When the homeowner (Hilary Mackenzie) returned, Timothy was taking a shower. When she confronted him, he barricaded himself in the bathroom and called 911 saying he was kidnapped. Although he sounds very polite, he was arrested and charged with first-degree criminal trespass. Both Timothy and Hilary's 911 calls are above. (

Man Shows His Appreciation For Incarcerated Girlfriend By Stealing Bras

Johnnie L. Brown, 29, of Ocala, Fla., is a donkey. On Tuesday, he was arrested and charged with retail petit theft after he stole two bras for his girlfriend who will be released from jail this month.“She has done so much for me,” Brown said later of the woman who has been his girlfriend for three years, “and I felt I had to support her.” On Tuesday, a Walmart loss prevention employee noticed a

Jailers Find 30 Items in Inmate's Ass

When 34-year-old Neil Lansing was arrested Friday, jailers at a Sarasota, Fla. were in for a surprise. Corrections deputies conducting a routine search in a cellblock found part of a condom sticking out of his rectum. In that condom was 17 round blue pills, one cigarette, six matches, one flint, one empty syringe with an eraser over the needle, one lip balm container, one additional unused condom

Guy Asks 911 Operator If It's Legal to Grow Weed - With Predictable Results

You can begin the hee-hawing for Robert J. Michelson, because this fella is the Donkey of the Month! The 21-year-old Farmington, Ct. resident was planning on doing some "farming" on his own, so called up some experts for some free legal advice for a "crime in progress". Robert called 911 last night to ask how much trouble he could get into for growing weed. [You can listen to the phone call,

Imbecile Sues Rite-Aid for $1.7 Million

We haven't announced a Donkey of The Day in a while, so today we have two. As you read this ridiculous story, keep the hee-haw soundtrack playing in your head.The lawyer for a man who allegedly developed life-threatening conditions after he was given the wrong prescription at a Rite Aid in Inglewood says his client deserves more than $1.7 million. Lieutenant Taylor, who says he is illiterate and

2-year-old Found Playing in Traffic; Mother Blames Toddler

A Louisville, Ky. woman was arrested Tuesday after her 2-year-old daughter wandered off into the cold and walked across a highway. A passerby noticed the toddler in the street and called police -- but here's the kicker: the mother, 20-year-old Pages C. Brents, is taking no responsible. Instead, she blames the child for getting out. What?!?The officers attempted to find the mother of the child,

Lady Fleeing Cops is Run Over by Her Own Car

We really shouldn't laugh, but...A Moses Lake woman was in critical condition this morning after accidentally running over herself with a vehicle while fleeing from police. Jona R. Zeigler, 40, suffered internal injuries, police said. She is being treated at Providence Sacred Heart Hospital in Spokane, according to a spokeswoman. The incident began about 12:30 p.m. Monday when a Moses Lake police

'Tip' Leads to Arsonist's Arrest

A man Titusville, Fla. man was arrested last weekend after she set fire to home. But were quick on his trail, because he left them a major "top".While they were investigating, police said, they discovered evidence of accelerants, leading them to determine that the fire was likely an arson. Then, while sifting through evidence, officers got a tip — literally. They found a piece of a latex glove

Guy Sues Hooker For Refund Plus $1.8 Million!

Hubert Blackman, a 22-year-old student at Borough of Manhattan Community College in NYC, who clearly doesn't pay any attention in English class, has filed a lawsuit against the company of the hooker he hired during a recent Las Vegas vacation for committing an "illegal sexual act" on him. (UPDATE: It was a hand job.) As a direct result of the experience, Hubert (pictured) says he's suffering from